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5 Ways To Define Love In Your Relationship

Love??? What the hell is that? The Bible tells you there are three different kinds of love. The dictionary, depending on which one you choose, has a bunch of different definitions. They can’t even decide if it’s a noun, verb, or an adjective. And with all that, you with your smart self, think you know EXACTLY what love is.

Some swear it’s what you can do for them, and others how you make them feel. Most of us think we know it all, so if you don’t do it the way we think you don’t know what love is. But just like the dictionary there are so many definitions how do you know who’s wrong or right? I know Keith Sweat said there is a right and a wrong way to love somebody, but he couldn’t even tell you what it was.

People start working out their definition from the time they exit the womb. All kinds of things play a part in molding the way they think. Love becomes an equation with all these inter changeable variables. How did their parents treat them, and what kind of relationship did they see their parents have. Childhood friendships and even those puppy love relationships that you have when you are too young to know what love is, helps you to build you definition.

The truth is I wish I could tell you what love is, and even if I could you probably wouldn’t believe me anyway. At the end of the day it really is what you think it is. Now the real trick is finding someone who thinks and feels the same way you do. The problem is they don’t exist.

No two people think and feel the exact same way about everything. Even if you feel the same about almost everything, somewhere on something you are different. It’s the same way when it comes to love. Your definitions might be almost the same, but not exactly the same yet it can still be love.

Here is how you define love in your relationship:

  1. Tell them what you think love is – The only way they’ll know what you expect is if you tell them.
  2. Find out what they think love is – Remember everyone is different and has their own definition.
  3. Figure out what you have in common – Even though they have a bunch of different definitions most share some common factor.
  4. Examine the things you disagree on – You won’t agree on everything, but that doesn’t mean you’re wrong.
  5. Figure out how the differences can benefit you – Remember just like you learn the good things about love, you also learned some bad things. Some of their differences my help you to let go of those bad things you’ve learned.

At the end of the day it’s not what anyone else says what love is. It’s what the two people in that relationship says love is, and as long as they agree that’s all that matters. Besides who are we to say what the hell love is???

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Robert Nolden

Robert Nolden

As an author, relationship advisor and speaker, Robert Nolden has taken life's lemons and truly made lemonade. After meeting and talking with many couples, he learned that oftentimes relationships could have been salvaged if there had been better communication. From that revelation came "From His Perspective" which seeks to enhance female understanding of what a man is saying and doing.

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