Are Black Marriages Being Redefined?
March 17th 2013, commemorated 10-years of celebrating Black Marriage Day as founded by Nisa Islam Muhammad. The day helps to bring awareness and encouragement to others in the community that Black Marriages still exist and should be celebrated. Since fewer marriages are represented today (less than 35%) in the African American community than were in the 1960’s when we had more than a 60% marriage rate, it leaves you to wonder who is celebrating.
For many women the prospects for marriage seem to be few and far between. It seems most men are already taken, incarcerated, bi-sexual/DL or just won’t commit to a monogamous situation. Therefore, more women are inclined to become the mistress for companionship or look to become the one who delves into work and forgets about becoming a wife or seeks to become a single mother without the help of a father.
Sure, strong single parents can and do rear law abiding, intelligent, and successful children. However, if both parents are in the picture a child has an even better chance to be a well-rounded and healthy individual (with healthy parents of course). If other classes of our society are taking to the courts for the right to marry, why are we not taking advantage of the institution of marriage? We should be fighting to give our families the very best we can in terms of a mother and father who provide a stable, loving, and nurturing environment for the next generation to grow in.
So, are we as a community simply tossing out the idea of marriage and shifting our idea of what marriage looks like in the 21st Century? Why are there so few positive marriages in our community where we raise our families? Will shacking up and doing it the KIM/KANYE way continue to be the norm? So many questions, yet only one answer would relieve my anxiety. Let’s get back to the loving, respectful relationships our grandmothers and grandfathers enjoyed as the vows proclaimed, “Until Death Do Us Part”. Remember, we marry to do life together, to grow together. Yes, you MarryMe4Life.