05 Jun 2013

4 Things You Should NEVER Say to Your Man

Your man needs you.  After a long day of work, he needs you to listen. When he is unsure of the next move to make, he looks to you for sound advice. And, when he doesn’t feel like he is on his A+ game, he needs you to be his

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19 Mar 2013

Facebook Farce: Fakes And Fiction Portrayed On Social Media

Once upon a time, someone told Mark Zuckerburg that perception is reality, so he created Facebook; the facilitator of insecurity, assumptions, and all things drama. It’s cost effective if you need an irresponsible outlet for your personal business. It also makes it easier to fine tune your public perception no

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11 Mar 2013

Dear Ladies, A Man Should Be Your Satisfier

For those of you who are married or in a committed relationship, you know that understanding your mate is like picking up a second language; complex yet feasible. Our differences are what ultimately attract us to one another, but it’s those same differences that can be the root of our

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10 Jan 2013

Boom Or Bust: Relationship Communication From A Male Perspective

I know it’s important for spouses to know how to speak to each other.  As a man, it’s important because we need to let our wives know we value them, but that we also see the need for communication in our marriage.  BUT…there are times when words are spoken that

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04 Dec 2012

Tony’s Tips: The ABC’s To Get Your Man To Handle Anything

Obviously there are huge differences between men and women when it comes to communicating and handling issues.  Most men, including me, just don’t want to talk about things that we know will cause discord. Yeah, we understand that avoidance really won’t resolve the issue, but we hope our girl will

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21 May 2012

The 80/20 Rule: The Grass Is NOT Greener On The Other Side

The perfect relationship; fact or myth? Myth! I have learned from personal experience that the 80/20 rule does exist. A few years ago I found myself peaking over the fence and actually tip toeing to see for myself how much greener the grass could be. But of course when viewing

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18 May 2012

How To Save Your Marriage After Financial Infidelity

Financial Infidelity continues to be a major contributing factor to why many marriages fail in this country.  In fact, it is a well known fact that money problems rank among the top three issues, along with sex and kids that cause the most arguments in a marriage. Financial infidelity, also

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04 May 2012

The Shut Up Zone: Learning When NOT To Speak

Communication is key. That is the belief of this generation. In fact, communication is a major economic commodity. Being connected is so important that almost every new electronic device boasts about internet connectivity. It seems that reaching others and being reached is so important that blue tooth devices and handsfree

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20 Feb 2012

I’m Having An Affair (Part I)

This has to stop. I can’t believe I’m sharing this, but I have to admit it. I’m past the embarrassment and deeply desire true healing from the situation. You see, I want to keep the communication with my hubby fresh, active, and healthy. But, I have to make a decision.

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18 Jan 2012

Do You Know How To Talk?

When you read the title of this discussion, I know most of you said, “Of course I know how to talk”. And I bet many of you can talk with the best of them…probably talking too much. Now let me add three more words to this same question. Do you

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19 Dec 2011

The Plants (Part 2)

In “The Plants…Part 1”, I spoke about how it’s important to get rid of the dead leaves in your marriage. This will give your marriage more room to grow in the areas where the “dead leaves” once occupied. Now there is another interesting situation with house plants that marriages can

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08 Dec 2011

You Can’t Change Her, You Have To Embrace Her

So today I am talking to a good male friend of mine. He mentions that he recently had talks with some women about being in love and things of that nature. One of the things he took away from the conversation is that women fall in love with the men

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07 Dec 2011

How to Survive the (failed) Grocery Store Hookup

Oh, look at him, my mind uncontrollably echoed. I focused to see what my subconscious had nudged me about. What I saw was a gentleman who was about 5’7” or 8” inches tall and he was approaching from the dairy section with a smile on his face as he glanced

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02 Dec 2011

The Art of Hearing

There’s this guy I like to hang out with. I’ve actually known him most of my life and was extremely pleased when we recently reconnected. At the risk of revealing his identity, all I’ll say is he was a high school sweetheart. This friend has had quite a colorful and

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11 Oct 2011

21 Days of Thanks

Today I turned 40 and I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited about a birthday.  Or ANY day for that matter.  It strikes me as odd, because over the years I have heard such negative things from folks as they age. But lucky for me, my Moms was just

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04 Oct 2011

Of Course She’s Crazy!!!

Of course she’s crazy!!! That’s right women are freakin nuts! A majority of them have lost their mind and have lost all common sense. Why has this happened? Cause they were born that way!….Ok  I’m done venting and being over the top : ). Seriously, I do believe a lot

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07 Sep 2011

Why Doesn’t My Boyfriend Listen To Me?

Dear Young Black Married Man: Simply put, my man doesn’t listen to me. I mean literally! I’ll tell him something and ask what do you think & he’s like what, what did you say. Other examples include me asking him to pick something up at the store, & when he

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06 Sep 2011

Opinions and A-holes

Recently one of my sisters shared some troubling news with me and I was very supportive (at the time).  A few days later, I began to offer suggestions to her on how she could remedy the situation. I further went on to tell her how she could have avoided the

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04 Aug 2011

You So Crazy!

One of my all-time favorite shows of the 90’s is Martin. In fact, I have all of the seasons on DVD; continue to watch the re-runs on MTV and TVOne; and even use the DVR from time to time when I’m going to miss one of the classics. I can

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29 Jul 2011

When “Nothing” means “Something”

“What’s wrong?” We’ve all been in a position where these two words questioned our well-being. When these words are uttered, it must be extremely apparent that something is weighing in on our thoughts but we’re quick to convince ourselves, and our man, that it’s “nothing.” Immediately a barrier is created

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20 Jul 2011

Bees STILL Prefer Honey Over Vinegar…

My mother is literally the “mother of all clichés.” Whenever she wanted to teach me a lesson, she would pull from her “old sayings” bank and make a deposit into my life.  No matter what it was, every message was taught around a cliché. “You can catch more bees with

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16 Jul 2011

What Did You Say?

“ It’s not what you say, but how you say it.” My then boyfriend-turned-husband would preach this so much – I could anticipate when he was going to say it. Whenever a heated conversation lurked, I was spitting venom with the intent to poison. I didn’t realize at the time

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