Epiphany of a Strong Black Independent Woman (pt. 3 of 3)
I’m always hesitant to write a blog on the different situations that I encounter because I deal with real people in real life. They come to me and without even knowing confide. Confidentiality is a dying trait so I am very particular about what I share. I decided to write about this one because most relationships don’t make it to the point past where one of the persons in the relationship has been treated in a less than desirable way. I can also say that their relationship has come a VERY long way from when I first got back in touch with O. I now consider them and example of what a good “black” marriage should be like. “It doesn’t cost anything to be nice” –Kim Sumner- It’s never too late to start, and I sincerely hope that someone will read this and consider appreciating what they have at home instead of focusing on what they don’t have to the point of no return.
I’m single, I’ve never even met her before and the few encounters I’ve had honestly have not been the most pleasant, but not necessarily bad. I honestly think that all she really needed was to know that I’m for them being together. Understandable, most friends end up being wedges in relationships. In spite of her hesitance, I am more than happy to prove it rather than say it or try to convince her. I consider them one in marriage and in life. Because I consider him a brother, his wife is my sister. With that in mind, 1st, it’s not my position to throw anything in her face. 2nd why would I? The situation on its own has given her a different and more positive outlook. 3. Even when I talk to him, I address him as a couple always referring back to them as “yall” because that’s what needs to be at the fore font of his and her mind. Not being in a singular state of mind. 4. When friends confide in you, be uplifting and let them resolve their issues in house. If you don’t have anything positive to say, be quiet and just listen.
“What can I do to earn your love today” – Roderick Middleton, “Nsumniac”
Ladies and gentlemen in marriage, no matter the situation, home should be a sanctuary from the harsh life that the world has to offer. If your significant other is doing right by you and is facing hard times remember, your both still rowing in the same boat. Sometimes you may feel like you are rowing on your own, but If he/she is still putting forth an effort to do better and have better, being harsh towards him or her is not helping but leaving a person renewed and refreshed will always be conveyed to the people he/she encounter outside of home ie during interviews and networking . You should ALWAYS be able to look forward to coming home and you never know, one day you may need to put your paddle away to navigate.
To O and Miss Wifey, should you ever come across this blog, I hope you understand and know that it’s to help others to become what you have achieved in your marriage. My goal was/is to portray the truth from my own perspective.