Marriage & CouplehoodMarry Me 4 Life

Wives, Should You Be On Girlfriend Duty?

Before any of us became Wifey, we were the girlfriend. We did what any girlfriend would do to show the guy how great of a potential wife we would make. We looked great each time he saw us; we cooked whenever he came over; we laughed at his jokes; and we pretended to love his favorite sport. We became his biggest supporter and cheerleader. He fell in love with the girlfriend that he couldn’t live without and proposed.  The wedding is gone and you are the new MRS. Fast forward and the honeymoon and girlfriend stage is over. But why, what causes us to stop being girlfriend minded and blinded by the title of wife? Your husband may be asking that same question.

Take a moment and think about the current state of your relationship. Are you offended or feeling unappreciated about your sacrifices because your husband says things have changed. Yes, I know real life happens with kids, finances, household chores; friends, in-laws, health issues, and the list can go on and on. But do not let the complications of life take you away from being the fun, ride or die girl he married.  We must remember as wives why the man we married chose his girlfriend to be his wife.

Maturity allows us all to see things a little differently as we go through the marriage seasons; but getting back to happy starts with changes you the wife can make. Incorporate some new rituals. Start off with minor changes like kissing him before leaving for work. Running to the door or garage when he gets home with a hug and a smile. Give it up on a regular basis and text him during the day to hint to what is coming his way. Saying I stand by you and believe in you can be done many ways. Girlfriends that become wives still need to cheer their man on and be his lover as well as his friend and life partner. Hard times come and go. There is no way around them, but don’t forget while passing through those trying moments staying connected is vital. Girlfriends help heal wounds, wives relieve why the wound happened. If this is you, check your self. Remember, men look for us to stay the same while we expect them to change. Remind him your not a stranger, you are the girlfriend he turned into a wife and give him the best of both worlds.

Disclaimer:  The advice in this article has proven to yield positive results for a lot of wives. However, following this advice and changing your behavior is at your own risk.

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Tarenia Carthan

Tarenia Carthan

Tarenia Carthan is an advocate for making lasting relationships. She and her husband Tony are the founders of Marry Me 4 Life, and are currently co-authoring a book together. Tony is also a blogger for Black Love Forum. Together they focus on couple’s enrichment.