Let’s Talk About Black Relationships
Blackloveforum.com is a website dedicated to Black love and healthy Black relationships. We have spent our entire existence trying to help others to get to a healthier place in their lives. Whether that be emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually or financially. It has been a great premise for years and an amazing goal forever. The only thing is, while we have been talking about relationships in terms of a man and a woman or a personal relationship with oneself, what we have not really taken a large scale look at is relationships in general. Meaning, the relationship between one Black person and another, or the relationships between Black people and others in society.
While I was sitting here digesting everything that has happened in Ferguson, Missouri over the past few days, what quickly became evident is that even though we as a people have progressed, we also have regressed. For every achievement, there has been a failure. We have been quick to point fingers at everyone else, but have not taken much of a hard look at ourselves at all. Let’s face the truth. Much of what happens on a day to day basis in America with Black people is self-inflicted.
Now before you start raising the Uncle Tom rhetoric or calling me anti-Black or misinformed, remember that I have been a champion for and of Black people for over 25 years. I have supported virtually every Black National Organization either with contributions of time, money or resources. I also happen to be……BLACK. So I have had my fair share of racism and profiling given to me as well.
What I am saying is this, Black people cannot expect for White people or any other race of people to bail us out of a situation that we continue to support and uplift as right when it is just as wrong as two left feet. I cannot expect for others to treat me right, if I do not treat myself right. I cannot expect for other people that look like me to respect me if I do not respect them. I cannot expect for other races to see me as being important if everything that I do marginalizes both me and my race. We have been speaking this for years, but no one wants to hear it until another child of ours is dead in the streets by the hands of someone of another race. But wait, what about the amount of our children who have been lying in the streets dead by the hands of our own race? Are you saying that a Black life does not matter if it was taken by the hands of another Black person? Surely that is not what is being said.
I have worked in criminal justice for over 20 years and because of that I have been privy to things that an ordinary citizen may never know. The truth is, we are at a serious crossroads. Many of us have lost our vision. Even worse, many of the youth have no identity and truly have no idea where they came from. One of the most dangerous people you would ever want to meet is the person who has no idea who he is. All too often, those people are the ones we are coming across in our daily lives.
So let’s start a discussion that leads to action. Not just in Ferguson, MO, but in all of America. Let’s talk about what worked in the past and what will be needed to work in the future. Let’s discuss true inter-race and intra-race relations. In an effort to help in this endeavor, I will be starting a regular series on Black Relationships 101. Everything that Black America needs, Black America has. We simply have to be willing to make the commitment to obtaining it.