Brotha TalkWhat The Love

She Told You She Was CRAZY! 3 Questions You Should Have Asked Yourself

She was the finest chic in the spot…a dime piece, if you will. Dressed to the nines, even wearing “red bottoms,” you just couldn’t stop looking, err…staring. Intimidating as she was, you stepped to her, ready to impress her by actually buying her a drink, and walking away (instead of hanging around—you know how some brothas do). So, that’s exactly what you did, but in her thank you, you saw something that made you stay. About 30 minutes into your conversation, you decided that she was more than just a pretty face, and boldly asked for another chance to see her.

She obliged.

You never get excited, but this one, well, she could be “the one,” so the 72 hours between your meeting and your next encounter had you trippin’! She shows up for the date, looking even better than you remembered. She looked so good that the other men in the restaurant gave you their player cards.

You thought it was cute when she told the waitress to bring her another napkin…with attitude. You thought it was sexy when she called a manager over and told him what he could do with the poor service you received—which was only in her opinion. And, you even thought she was joking when she chastised you for not opening her doors fast enough.

Well…she wasn’t being cute, she wasn’t being sexy, and she wasn’t joking.  She was telling you that she is crazy! She was showing you some signs that at some future time, she may unleash her true disposition on you and it won’t be pretty. More like, pretty painful!

Now, a little attitude is sexy, this is true. But, repeated acts of nastiness—large or small—are not something that you should ignore. This is a real part of this individual’s personality, and it may get worse the more time she spends with you, and the more comfortable she becomes with, “being herself” around you.

So, despite becoming quite smitten with her*, you have to begin to ask yourself a few questions, such as:

  1. If this behavior escalated, would I be embarrassed, or be forced to take action(s)?
  2. If this behavior was directed at me, how would I feel, and how would I respond?
  3. If this behavior was the norm, would I want to spend the rest of my days (or any amount of time) dealing with it?

Get the idea?

In my opinion, most men don’t see crazy coming. Crazy cleverly disguises itself in sexy clothes, undeniable curves, and a beautiful smile.

However, while she may not actually be crazy, anytime you witness “crazy” behavior, realize that it could be significant. It could be a “red flag.”

After you realize the importance of what has happened, process the incident and decide how big of a deal—if any—it is to you, and what your next steps should be.

Then either run like he**, or buckle up and enjoy the ride!  But, whatever you do, don’t make me say, “She told you so.” (*This can be applied to “him” also.)


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Stephanie D. McKenzie (MBA, CPC, CRC)

Stephanie D. McKenzie (MBA, CPC, CRC)

Stephanie McKenzie is the founder of WhatTheLove™ which offers energetic, entertaining, and educational individual and group coaching programs. These programs are designed to remove the power and pain of bad relationships in your life.

1 Comment

  1. July 1, 2012 at 10:10 PM

    In my opinion most men see it coming. They are just hoping they can get some booty before they have to cut her off, or they choose to overlook it because they become infatuated.