14 Jun 2013

Love Still Good? When “We” Became “You and I”

How many times have you heard about a married couple who seemed to just be existing in their marriage?  Neither spouse wants to separate, but it seems as if neither is willing to put in any effort to make it work.  But why?  The spark is gone, the fire and

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05 Jun 2013

4 Things You Should NEVER Say to Your Man

Your man needs you.  After a long day of work, he needs you to listen. When he is unsure of the next move to make, he looks to you for sound advice. And, when he doesn’t feel like he is on his A+ game, he needs you to be his

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01 Apr 2013

The Working Wife: 8 Ways To Have Productive Communication With Your Husband

If one more person tells me, “communication is key” to a happy marriage, I’m going to communicate something alright.  What they fail to do is tell you what ”communication” between a husband and wife should look and sound like.  It’s definitely more than just two people talking and listening.  If

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11 Mar 2013

Dear Ladies, A Man Should Be Your Satisfier

For those of you who are married or in a committed relationship, you know that understanding your mate is like picking up a second language; complex yet feasible. Our differences are what ultimately attract us to one another, but it’s those same differences that can be the root of our

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10 Jan 2013

Boom Or Bust: Relationship Communication From A Male Perspective

I know it’s important for spouses to know how to speak to each other.  As a man, it’s important because we need to let our wives know we value them, but that we also see the need for communication in our marriage.  BUT…there are times when words are spoken that

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04 Dec 2012

Tony’s Tips: The ABC’s To Get Your Man To Handle Anything

Obviously there are huge differences between men and women when it comes to communicating and handling issues.  Most men, including me, just don’t want to talk about things that we know will cause discord. Yeah, we understand that avoidance really won’t resolve the issue, but we hope our girl will

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21 May 2012

The 80/20 Rule: The Grass Is NOT Greener On The Other Side

The perfect relationship; fact or myth? Myth! I have learned from personal experience that the 80/20 rule does exist. A few years ago I found myself peaking over the fence and actually tip toeing to see for myself how much greener the grass could be. But of course when viewing

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23 Apr 2012

Love And Money Communication – 7 Questions You Should Ask Your Mate

Statistics consistently show that money is the number one source of disagreement in the early years of marriage. In fact, it is has been shown to be one of the top three reasons as to why couples seek divorce. With statistics like this, it makes you wonder why even in

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13 Apr 2012

The Elephant In The (Dating) Room: (pt. 3)-Communication

I often tweet the following statement, “it’s really a big deal if your significant other doesn’t communicate with you.”  And it is. A lack of communication quickly becomes an elephant that can quickly destroy any relationship. While there may be no malicious intent on the part of the non-communicating party, failing

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10 Apr 2012

The Elephant In The (Dating) Room: (pt. 2)- Commitment

Well, let’s not waste any time…let’s deal with another big elephant, “commitment.” There was a time when we could all just assume that we’re in a committed relationship. You remember the days, when you could slip the object of your desire a note that read, “Do you like me? Yes…No…Maybe.

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13 Mar 2012

Falling In Love Ain’t Shhhhut Yo Mouth! Somebody Please Talk To Me About How To Stay There

“People grow apart, people change… All of these people running around here jumping, hopping, skipping, diving, falling in love…falling in love ain’t sh*t. Somebody talk to me PLEASE about how to stay there. Do I love my wife? Hell yes. Is she here? Hell no.” This is an interesting dialogue

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18 Jan 2012

Do You Know How To Talk?

When you read the title of this discussion, I know most of you said, “Of course I know how to talk”. And I bet many of you can talk with the best of them…probably talking too much. Now let me add three more words to this same question. Do you

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08 Dec 2011

You Can’t Change Her, You Have To Embrace Her

So today I am talking to a good male friend of mine. He mentions that he recently had talks with some women about being in love and things of that nature. One of the things he took away from the conversation is that women fall in love with the men

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07 Dec 2011

How to Survive the (failed) Grocery Store Hookup

Oh, look at him, my mind uncontrollably echoed. I focused to see what my subconscious had nudged me about. What I saw was a gentleman who was about 5’7” or 8” inches tall and he was approaching from the dairy section with a smile on his face as he glanced

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02 Dec 2011

The Art of Hearing

There’s this guy I like to hang out with. I’ve actually known him most of my life and was extremely pleased when we recently reconnected. At the risk of revealing his identity, all I’ll say is he was a high school sweetheart. This friend has had quite a colorful and

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07 Sep 2011

Why Doesn’t My Boyfriend Listen To Me?

Dear Young Black Married Man: Simply put, my man doesn’t listen to me. I mean literally! I’ll tell him something and ask what do you think & he’s like what, what did you say. Other examples include me asking him to pick something up at the store, & when he

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06 Sep 2011

Opinions and A-holes

Recently one of my sisters shared some troubling news with me and I was very supportive (at the time).  A few days later, I began to offer suggestions to her on how she could remedy the situation. I further went on to tell her how she could have avoided the

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04 Aug 2011

You So Crazy!

One of my all-time favorite shows of the 90’s is Martin. In fact, I have all of the seasons on DVD; continue to watch the re-runs on MTV and TVOne; and even use the DVR from time to time when I’m going to miss one of the classics. I can

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29 Jul 2011

When “Nothing” means “Something”

“What’s wrong?” We’ve all been in a position where these two words questioned our well-being. When these words are uttered, it must be extremely apparent that something is weighing in on our thoughts but we’re quick to convince ourselves, and our man, that it’s “nothing.” Immediately a barrier is created

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20 Jul 2011

Bees STILL Prefer Honey Over Vinegar…

My mother is literally the “mother of all clichés.” Whenever she wanted to teach me a lesson, she would pull from her “old sayings” bank and make a deposit into my life.  No matter what it was, every message was taught around a cliché. “You can catch more bees with

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