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The Truth About Side Pieces

Being that Valentine’s Day just passed and for the past two weeks I have seen and heard a constant barrage of information about “side chicks”, I felt it was rightfully time for a man to actually speak out about side pieces. Now sit still and hold on tight because what I am about to say is going to cut both ways.

But before I go into this valuable information, let me qualify myself for the assignment. As a fully grown man who could be considered handsome by some and charming by others, I have been blessed to have many dates and/or relationships in my day.  I have dated a myriad of women and have been involved with a range that can basically go from great to below average. In other words, I been around long enough and done enough to know what I am talking about.

The concept of side piece is NOT new and it is NOT gender specific. Hollywood has tried to paint the picture that the side piece is always a woman and that she is either a victim or she actually went into the situation knowing the man had someone else. Well……I have been a side piece before and I was neither a victim nor am I female. Basically I saw what I wanted and I went for it. At the end of the day, it was a mutual agreement between two grown folks.  So we will stop right now with the notion that every side piece is female. That is false. Any fellas reading this may want to evaluate the dates that his girl is missing and what time she stops answering his phone calls.


Next, for as long as I can remember, there have been instances of men and women living double lives. A man being married and having a family, but also has a child by the neighbor or the woman across the street. Likewise, there are numerous stories of women having a family and yet having a “jump off” in other cities when she is traveling.  In fact, it would seem that the more powerful and successful the woman, the more likely she is to have a jump off in other cities.

I am not here to condone nor am I here to condemn. What two grown folks do is their business. But what I am here to say is that people who live in glass houses cannot throw stones. A man cannot try and crack jokes about February 13th and 15th being side piece days while he is in fact someone else’s side piece. Nor can a woman talk down on other women who may indeed be side pieces if the woman talking is herself a side piece. Hypocrisy knows no rules when it comes to dating and relationships. Clearly folks are either getting the game all mixed up or they simply have gotten so bold as to think they will never get caught. Listen, it happens. At some point or another, you will make a mistake. At that point, you will be forced to make a decision that is ultimately going to leave someone hurt and disappointed. At the end of the day, open communication by everyone involved is the only way to work around this situation. So please, be respectful. Even if you are doing dirt, there is a certain amount of decorum that should be used. Enjoy your life, but do not ruin someone else’s in the process.

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Richard 'BigRich' Evans

Richard 'BigRich' Evans

With nearly 20 years of experience in juvenile justice, public speaking, youth and young adult coaching and intervention, Richard 'BigRich' Evans' brand of straight talk has touched thousands.